Boundaries and putting yourself first

It’s been a busy and exciting week as I launched my new knit-along - the Boundaries Blanket KAL and the dedicated facebook group has been humming as we have all been discussing yarn choices, colours and of course, a few personal boundaries.

Week 1 went out on Wednesday (20th Nov) and as it’s going to be a relaxed bi-weekly KAL there’s still plenty of time to join in if you wanted to (you can find the pattern here). I know that some people have signed up but intend to save the patterns and make a start on them in that lovely relaxed Twixtmas period between Christmas and New Year, which seems like a fine plan to me.

I’ve been really encouraged by the positive response to the KAL and so many people have taken the trouble to get in touch and say how much it has resonated with them. One theme that has struck me throughout these comments is the number of people saying that either they don’t usually do KALs, or that once joined they rarely stick to them.

And it dawned on me - as indeed it had dawned on some of those who contacted me that this is just another example of where boundaries can be drawn. All too often we allow ourselves to put aside what we really want to work on, in favour of something for someone else. Whether it’s a birthday gift for a friend that we think we ‘have to’ knit, or a pair of socks for that relative that we just can’t say no to. 

Even though we might be happy to oblige, there’s often a small part us, tucked away that feels secretly resentful or, at the very least it feels neglected and not listened too.

By doing the opposite, picking a project that we really want to work on. Picking something that really speaks to us - whether it’s the yarn, the colour or the rhythmic pattern what we are really doing is putting ourselves first. Telling that small part of us that we really do matter - as much as, if not more than the cold footed uncle who would really like some socks. 

Of course, it’s nice to knit for others but it’s so easy to fall into the guilt trap of only knitting for others, or somehow feeling guilty for knitting for ourselves - but that’s a topic for a whole other blog post.

For now, why not just grab a favourite beverage, your yarn and needles and relax - making something just for you. At the risk of sounding like a cliched cosmetic advert - you really are worth it.